Unhappy New Year

Never say at the beginning of a year: "This year is going to be my year!" Because people you love will die and the winter will drag on forever.

I Can't Make Art.

I can't make art in this bra.

I can't make art while my sister is driving home in a thunderstorm.

I can't make art when I'm worried about quitting Chili's on Monday.

I can't make art when I'm alone too long.

I can't make art if there are people around.

I can't make art if people keep asking me about it.

I can't make art if someone around me is watching tv.

I can't make art if I have been around a tv in the last hour.

I can't make art if I haven't left the apartment today.

I can't make art if I haven't had three meaningful conversations today.

I can't make art if I sit on the computer for more than fifteen minutes.

I can't make art if I'm too hungry or too cold.

I can't make art if I'm full or too warm.

I can't make art when I can't find my scissors.

I can't make art if I've eaten too much cookie cake today.

I can't make art because my aunts really bothered me today.

I can't make art while babies are being born 

or people are dying 

or if I have headaches 

or if my face is breaking out

or if it's early in the morning

or if it's too late

or if my nails are painted

or if I haven't slept enough

or if I've slept too much

or if I'm alive.

or if I'm dead.

Bad Titles by Brit

1. Colby, Cheddar or Pepper Jack?

2. Where's the Fruitcake, Who are you Calling a Fruitcake, I'm Gonna Punch you in the Face.

3. Are Chocolate Covered Strawberries Too Forward?

4. Worst Thing That Can Happen Tonight is That I Have to Eat All The Chocolate Covered Strawberries By Myself.

5. Where's the Yogurt?

Monthly Joke

Once a month I tell myself the same joke, .."The bad news: I'm on my period. The good news: I'm on my period."

Ortho Tri-Cyclen Lo

As a woman without health insurance I pay $76 a month for birth control, which makes me feel like I need to have at least $76 worth of sex each month. 

America

Sometimes I feel like a rebellious teenager and America is my parent. America is like "Get a desk job and a 9-5 career. Make money. Buy a house and some land, wouldn't it be nice to settle down? You might want to think about having kids soon. Start your own family! Live the American dream!" and I'm like "That's your dream not mine!" and "You don't care about me all you care about is money!" But I'm the kind of rebellious, angry teenager that still wants the good things from it's parents even though it's been disrespectful. Instead of "Mom I hate you! What's for dinner? I need a new pair of jeans." I'm like "America you suck. Supply me with safe surroundings and give me freedom of speech!" 

Logging things on the Web

So this is blogging. I am now a web logger. Do I do things like this? Am I the kind of person that blogs? I don't think so.. but maybe I am. Shannon the Blogger sounds too foreign.. let's just call me a writer. Can we do that? Shannon the Writer. That feels better. I guess I should start off this first post by explaining the title of my blog. "Huge Bugs, Small Birds" comes from an experience that I had in April of last year while I was taking a break at the Center for Visual Arts building. These were originally a series of texts that I sent to a friend and were later copied in my journal.


April 19th, 2009 - 5:12-5:27 p.m.
I'm watching a bug climb up the tree out front from the second floor window. 
It is the biggest bug I've ever seen. 
Today is a good day.
I can still see it on the highest branch! 
My heart feels heavy and I can feel my pulse in my ears. 
I am crying. 
Today is a good day.
A bird landed on the branch and it jumped. 
THE BUG JUMPED! I watched it fall to the ground.
I ran outside to look for it but I didn't see it. 
Today is the best day of my life.


Later as I walked out to leave I saw my big bug. 
It was a small climbing bird.
This is the story of my life.


A shorter version of this story that I used in my artwork later was "Huge bugs, small birds: on this day they were the same thing."  I think about this experience so often that I feel like it's my life motto or something. Huge bugs, small birds reminds me that things are what I make of them and how I choose to see them. I can choose to have a good attitude, good relationships and make the best of situations. This blog is just to share some of my writings, thoughts and every now and then some artwork too. 

ahhh! huge bugs, small birds in my apartment!

..Wait. ...  does this mean I'm a blogger?